dOuGiEfNfReSh

When I was younger…….. I’d put my arms in my shirt and told people I lost my arms. Would restart the video game whenever I knew I was going to lose. Slept with all the stuffed animals as a child so none of them got offended..Had that one pen with 4 colors, and tried to push all the buttons at once. Poured soda into the cap and acting like I were taking shots. The hardest decision was choosing which Nintendo game to play. Waited behind a door to scare someone, then leaving because they’re taking too long to come out or you had to pee. Faked being asleep, so I could be carried to bed. Used to think that the moon followed my car. Watching two drops of rain roll down window and pretending it was a race. Went on the computer just to use Paint. The only thing i had to take care of was a Tamagotchi. The only ‘fake’ friends i had were invisible ones . I used to sing in the shower. (Now? I make life decisions in there now). Swallowed a fruit seed I was scared to death that a tree was going to grow in my tummy. Getting a bruised knees heals better than a broken heart. Remember when we were kids and couldn’t wait to grow up…what the hell were we thinking?

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When you’re in an awkward situation

sodamnrelatable:

but then your bestfriend arrives you’re like:

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unclefather:

honey boo boo looks like an angry bridge troll

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taona:

de-bris:

m-adis0n:

moffat-justno:

itsnguy3n:

ebullient-efflorescence:

puellamaggiemagica:

pope-of-shizlam:

choc0late-rain:

sheaforest:

d-issolve:

j-alouse:

fuq-stick:

deestarvivo:

hedonistica:

holy shit this is actually insane

the actual fuck?

oh my fuck that is so insane

holy fuck my head hurts

this is the most interesting thing i’ve ever read.

woah…

omfGfgh

Take the time to read this, sooooooooo interesting

what did i just read… woah

holy shit the most interesting thing ive read in a while

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comedycentral:

Think you know your crap? Play #SouthPark’s Mr. Hankey Pop Quiz and prove it! http://on.cc.com/gyCK5r

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collegehumor:

Remember, if I win I get to unleash Armageddon

“And if I lose, the Mayans were wrong.”

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the-beauty-of-words-blog:

Via/Follow The Beauty of Words Blog

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"My professor tried to ease the class into a question by asking “What calendar does the United States of America use?” A girl in front of my whispered to her friend, “I think it’s the Mayan”. The other girl promptly raised her hand and announced “Um… the Mayan!"

uPick Classroom - Which calendar?

Shout-out to everybody whose dashboards and feeds are clogged with Mayans-panic right now.
(via collegehumor)

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